getting to know “just jacie”

i have always been quirky. i don’t like grilled cheese sandwiches so now i know you must understand. i have strayed from being “normal” my whole life. i am dark and twisty at times. this is not the page for you if you are in search of jubilance 24/7. this is me- at my truest and most raw form.

i have never been a strong or effective communicator unless it involved writing. blogging is new to me. i am just beginning but i am extremely hopeful that i may reach someone and let everyone know that you are not alone in any of your journeys.

while i have a great life with my wonderful girlfriend, brooke and my fur baby, bug. i face depression, anxiety, bipolar disorders, and deal with numerous autoimmune diseases. many days i feel down, as i have struggled with medication changes time and time again. however, i know that many others must be dealing with the same dreadful feelings in their journeys too.

one of my health journeys began in fifth grade, when i was diagnosed with hashimoto’s disease. later in life, i was then diagnosed with anxiety and depression which lead to my diagnosis of bipolar depression. i have tried dozens of medications which have caused severe side effects and landed me in the hospital. at times i question my sanity and why i continue to fight this endless battle daily. i am always brought back to my girlfriend, my mother, and my fur baby. when times get tough, i know that i can always count on my people to be there for me.

throughout my journey, i have learned a lot about myself and my determination for my happiness. i fight everyday of my life even if that means that i only was able to accomplish a shower that day. so while it is just “another day in paradise”, i pray that dark under-towing current doesn’t sweep you up.

one of my favorite quotes by john green is, “your now is not your forever” and that is something i remind myself of daily. whatever you are facing in your life right now- you will get through it. this is only temporary. however, i am a realist and that means that i am fully aware of what is real and happening at all times. so i will spare you the cheerful bull**** and let you all know that sometimes, life just sucks. do you ever feel like just giving up? i think about it often. just know, giving up isn’t an option. who makes your life worth living? remind them that you are grateful for their support.

& just remember, you got this!